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Just know I will always love you.

Written in by Sarah, Age 13 Florida My husband died of cancer 6 months ago. It's been really hard; we were together for 18 yrs. He was only 44 years old. I miss him dearly. He taught me to see when I was blind all things worthwhile, Then he left me behind to see them all alone I can't take this body with me. There's nothing sad about an old shell It was April 1st, yeah April Fool's day. My friends and I had just finished with dinner and were talking about April Fool's jokes.

I was just about to walk out the door when the phone rang. It was Amanda saying, "Nicole, Jason Anctil is dead. However, there was a tone in her voice that made me shiver, and then I knew it was true. You would never catch him in a bad mood; his one goal in life was to have fun.

Grief Recovery Institute Articles -

He could make fun out of any situation. He was the kind of guy that people loved to be around and he had tons of friends. Nobody didn't like Jason, and he didn't dislike anybody either. In all the years I knew him- I never once heard him make fun of anybody else. He never let the little things get to him- like I said he just loved life.

His famous line was "live a little. At first we were told it was an overdose, but when the results came back it proved there were no drugs in his system. We still don't know what happened to our friend. I just don't get it- he was only 20 years old. Why am I still here, and getting chances at life, and not him? It's just not fair that a family has to go through what Jay's family is going through. It breaks my heart to know that they will never feel truly happy for as long as the rest of their lives maybe, because a piece of them is gone now too.

He didn't deserve this. He had so many hopes and dreams. There was so much he wanted to accomplish, and will never have the opportunity too now. I mean it when I say this world is a different place without him in it. He didn't wait for things to happen- he made things happen. I just hope that wherever he is now, he is happy. I hope he also knows that not a day goes by that we don't think about him. Not one day passes that my friends and I don't mention him, and laugh without memories of him. I hope he is happy, but at the same time understands our sadness because he is gone.

I know Jay though and he wouldn't want us to grieve for too long, he would want us to be happy. But it's hard, really hard. He was one of a kind, nobody like Jay in this whole big world. The funeral was the hardest thing I have ever gone through in my entire life, and I never want to experience anything like that again.

His death has more than anything taught me that I am not nearly as tough of a person that I used to think I was. At some points I cried so hard that I couldn't breathe, I just wanted to scream as loud as I could because there is no controlling the situation. To all of my friends, I love you so much, please be careful- I don't know if I can make it without you. To Jason, we miss you so much; we will always miss the way you made us all laugh, the way you used to dance around and be the life of the party, that stupid little grin that made you so cute.

We will all miss your kindness, and unbelievable personality. And if there is a heaven- God is lucky to have you with him. We will always remember you with smiles on our faces and love in our hearts.

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We will always feel lucky to have known you, and Jason, you will never be forgotten. Nicole Tardif New York I feel in my heart that by sharing this poem that I wrote in the lowest period of my life, it may help someone that may be going through the loss of a loved one. However, I think Reba is probably a little busy. That is what is engraved on my husband's tombstone located in Lewisburg, TN.

I love you Clint and will always hold a place for you in my heart. I wrote this 6 years ago. The assignment was to write an Imagination essay on someone that was no longer alive. I wrote this essay from my heart and imagination. It is what I would imagine my late husband would say to me if we were to have a meeting together. This is purely imagination not an after death experience. This essay helped me to heal and I suggest that anyone that is grieving to write a letter to the one you lost and say everything you need to say and when you finish you may burn it.

It is a great release of all the emotions and it heals the soul. While the paramedics are working on my body, I die. All of the sudden, I am in a beautiful place but it is not what is expected of heaven. I see someone walking toward me. It him, it's really him! I begin talking to the one person that has been the center of my life. I begin to talk to my late husband and tell him that I love him and I miss him very much, as we walk hand-in-hand up a golden winding road surrounded by thorn less, long stem, vibrant rose bushes.

What is heaven like?

He took my hand and told me that it is too beautiful and peaceful for a living soul to even imagine. I wanted to climb in your casket with you, but was forcefully dragged away from it.


Clint, I temporarily lost my sanity when you left me. Watching them throw mounds on dirt on the casket holding the body that I grew accustomed to holding every night, gave me nightmares for years. You dreamed of me telling you to get away from me and join the others playing outside, but you held onto me and grieved yourself inside. I was still with you after the funeral. I laid beside you and held you while you cried.

You saw me in your vision standing on the beach smiling at you.

Helping grieving people at their time of greatest need.

That was the only way I could tell you I was alright and it was my only way of saying goodbye. I went through several phases of grief, depression, anger, self-pity, hatred, and temporary loss of reality. People urged me to see a counselor or a pastor, but I couldn't do it. You know how stubborn I am. I wanted help so bad, but I felt safer pushing everyone away from me.

I was all alone on a new base, and just wanted to make the best impression on my new co-workers. I didn't want them to think of me as their new problem child, so I became a workaholic.

I walked around work with the biggest smile to everyone but inside I was screaming for help. I would sit in the corner of my dark room, crying for hours while holding our wedding picture. A couple of times, I thought that maybe I was in a coma and any moment, I would wake up in a hospital somewhere and you would be standing there waiting for me to wake up. I drove around many of times looking for your car, even though I knew you were gone forever. Several times I wanted to run my truck into a tree, but I figured I would probably survive the accident and become a vegetable for the rest of my life.

Momma was the only person that kept me from attempting suicide. I couldn't imagine her having to go to another funeral, especially mine. Thank you for being my friend, lover and soul mate. Thanks for dancing with me in the living room, watching the sunset with me, listening to all of my goals and dreams, for standing by my side through thick and thin, standing behind me on decisions even if it meant standing in my shadow, and thank you for the memories that will be eternally etched into my heart.

I admire you for your courage and faith. I love you and I thank you for loving me.

The Mourner's Six Reconciliation Needs

Sometimes you may need to distract yourself from the pain of death, while at other times you will need to create a safe place to move toward it. Unfortunately, our culture tends to encourage the denial of pain. Actually, doing well with your grief means becoming well acquainted with your pain. Do you have any kind of relationship with someone after they die? You have a relationship of memory. Precious memories, dreams reflecting the significance of the relationship and objects that link you to the person who died such as photos, souvenirs, etc.

This need of mourning involves allowing and encouraging yourself to pursue this relationship. But some people may try to take your memories away. Trying to be helpful, they encourage you to take down all the photos of the person who died. They tell you to keep busy or even to move out of your house.

But remembering the past makes hoping for the future possible.

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Your future will become open to new experiences only to the extent that you embrace the past. Part of your self-identity comes from the relationships you have with other people. When someone with whom you have a relationship dies, your self-identity, or the way you see yourself, naturally changes. A death often requires you to take on new roles that had been filled by the person who died.

After all, someone still has to take out the garbage, someone still has to buy the groceries. You confront your changed identity every time you do something that used to be done by the person who died. This can be very hard work and can leave you feeling very drained. You may occasionally feel child-like as you struggle with your changing identity. You may feel a temporarily heightened dependence on others as well as feelings of helplessness, frustration, inadequacy and fear.

Many people discover that as they work on this need, they ultimately discover some positive aspects of their changed self-identity. You may develop a renewed confidence in yourself, for example. You may develop a more caring, kind and sensitive part of yourself. You may develop an assertive part of your identity that empowers you to go on living even though you continue to feel a sense of loss.

A basic reality for most grieving people is difficulty concentrating or focusing. With that in mind, we asked Tributes. Sharing our concern for grieving people, they agreed. On March 6, , former first lady Nancy Reagan died. When an acquaintance has lost a loved one, it can be difficult to know what to say or do.

The common bond that connects all holiday celebrations is that they tend to be family-oriented events. Certain events have the power to propel us into an emotional numbness, as if a hidden thermostat inside our hearts shuts us off. Almost everyone has some questions and confusion about crying. How much crying is enough? If I start crying, will I be able to stop? By Russell FriedmanSeptember 11, now lives in our language in the same emotional way as December 7, and November 22, In mid-April there are two things you can count on in the United States.