Or maybe you go to a bar, maneuver someone into offending you, and get into a fight. Years ago I became a very good marksman with a pistol. How could I learn not to do something unless I had learned how it felt to do it? So, in order to shoot well, I had to train myself to feel the various tiny muscles of my hand and arm; once I felt them, I could then direct them. Well, that was all many years ago, and I no longer have much use for guns, but I learned a good psychological lesson from it.
How can you learn not to do something unless you understand quite clearly how it does feel to do it? How can you learn not to respond defensively to a feeling of vulnerability unless you understand quite clearly how it does feel to be vulnerable? If you are always hiding your hurt feelings behind a protective show of bitter curses or guns you will never catch on to the concept of enlightened emotional restraint.
To accomplish this, parents, along with the rest of the culture in general, tend to suppress all recognition of individual emotions in their children. As long as the children stay within their culture they can function, but if they migrate to a Western culture, then emotional conflicts can cause profound psychological confusion. This entire process is a bit like what happens when an insect stings you and you feel a pain way out of proportion to the size of the stinger.
First you simply recognize that it hurts. Then you have to explore the wound to find the stinger. The stinger represents the insult that hurts you, digging out the stinger represents the psychological task of realizing how this one insult pierces deep into your self-esteem, and the venom which spreads into the surrounding tissues represents the way unconscious resentment about all sorts of old emotional injuries from the past continues to poison you even in the present.
- York Murder & Crime.
- Smashwords – Repression 3 - Revenge! – a book by John Savage?
- Howl at Twilight?
W hy do we have such a hard time recognizing our feelings of vulnerability and hurt when we are insulted? Well, go back to that image of that car cutting in front of you. Well, it all sinks down into the unconscious where fantasies that is, fleeting mental images, often only subliminally perceived wage their private wars of revenge. I once had to sit through a Rambo movie with some family members. There he was with those half-asleep Italian eyes, his muscles twitching, taking the insults. And then they were slapping themselves and cheering as he hefted his huge machine gun and took aim.
Many persons have such deep anger at their parents that they unconsciously desire to keep themselves dysfunctional as a way to get back at their parents. All anger is, at its core, a dark and cruel wish for harm to come upon the person who hurt you. Note that we can even direct our anger at things. If a tool breaks right in the middle of an important task, leaving us feeling frustrated and helpless, we will smash the tool onto the floor and curse it. I wish you were dead! And then, when the tears dry, nothing is ever said again about the words of her outburst.
So we all suffer insult, and we all feel hurt, and we all tend to sink into fantasies of revenge. So what honest alternative is there? Well, you can get up the courage to explore the human psyche a bit more deeply than most persons want to go and discover something about human nature. You will discover a concept about human psychology that theology and religion have for ages called sin. Or, to say it more simply, most people are narcissistically preoccupied with their immediate desires and have little, if any, altruistic awareness of anyone or anything else around them.
Sin therefore leads you away from true love and compassion, and it sends you right into all the predicaments of self-indulgence. Sin really does hurt others because sin defiles love. Narcissistic Personality Disorder refers to a pervasive pattern of grandiosity in fantasy or behavior , a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. Those who know true love act with confidence, straightforwardness, and honesty, whereas those who present themselves as nice are often merely hiding the depths of their anger behind a show of smiling appeasement.
For example, after exploring their childhood memories, some persons will say that they feel sad or lonely but do not feel any anger at their parents. In these cases, the anger can be recognized not through the emotion of rage but through specific behaviors of hate. Hatred for authority can be expressed through criminal activity; political protest and terrorism ; abortion; shoplifting; speeding; being late for appointments; living in clutter or filth; etc.
More about psychotherapy and anger at parents. To forgive means simply that you refuse to keep hating someone. In practical terms, this refusal to hate is a conscious decision, from the depths of your heart, to give up your desire to feel the satisfaction of knowing that the one who caused your hurt will get hurt in the end. Notice here that the silent, secret desire for satisfaction keeps unconscious anger alive and growing and prevents genuine forgiveness.
They may not believe in sin, yet it is breeding right under their noses. Psychology concerns the individual, and forgiveness is an individual act.
Repression 3 - Revenge!
And for that matter, peace is also a matter of individual will, not of politics. No government can order you to love, and no government can order you to hate. A ccording to the principles of geometry, an infinite number of lines can be drawn through a single point. To define any one particular line, two points are needed. The same sort of principle applies to psychology. The experience of one trauma does not tell you much about your unconscious, because any explanation is as good as any other.
If the trauma is repeated, however, then you have two points to define a line which can be tracked back into the past and projected into the future.
And maybe others again, until you start to look at your life and ask yourself what is going on. This concept of psychological repetition , however, has nothing to do with naturally recurring cycles. Repetition refers to an unconscious process by which you essentially lead yourself into trouble over and over. For some dark, unknown reason, you so despise yourself that you continually put yourself at risk.
You will feel victimized by the world. You might even become a psychological terrorist. When a child is abused, it cannot be claimed that the child has any responsibility for the abuse. Violence is always the responsibility of the perpetrator, and, when violence is repeated, the perpetrator is at fault. There is, however, a psychodynamic process called Identification with the Aggressor in which the abused child, in trying to make sense of something essentially senseless, comes to believe that the abuse must somehow be justified, and the child will therefore unconsciously seek to befriend, and even imitate, the abuser.
With this dynamic in place, blame and anger toward the abuser becomes turned toward the self, thus beginning the repetition of an unconscious, self-inflicted abuse. In fact, scientific research has shown that adults who were sexually abused as children tend to have a high risk for being sexually assaulted e. Moreover, the research shows that adults who are sexually assaulted and who were also abused as children tend to have even lower levels of mental health functioning than those persons who were sexually abused as children but never sexually assaulted as adults.
As a result of abuse, the child experiences painful fear and hatred of the abuser s. Because this self-destructive behavior is unconsciously directed against the world, not the self, the child cannot see, let alone accept consciously, that he or she is now causing most of his or her own pain. And so the child grows into an adult who harbors an aching bitterness against the world for its unpunished abuses. They lack a meaningful future. All because their fathers were lacking. Note, however, that all of this lack resulting from the lack of a father is, in many cases, largely unconscious.
But other persons are able to keep up a surface appearance of functionality; they hold jobs, they get married, and they have children. Yet under the surface of normality a deep secret of anger and victimization is buried. Here are the dark roots of symptom after symptom of secret resentment for the father.
In the unconscious, however, the anger gets distorted because it is difficult for children to be angry with a father from whom they still desire a sign of love. To protect themselves from this dilemma, their unconscious finds an ingenious solution to raw, dangerous anger: There is no current psychiatric diagnosis for this collection of symptoms, so I have named a psychoanalytic diagnosis: Ira Patrem Latebrosa hidden anger at the father.
This is an anger at the father that so cloaks itself in invisibility that a person afflicted with it will deny that it even exists. This episode explores mind control triggered by a subliminal message and the loyalties of crew members. The friendship between Commander Tuvok and Captain Janeway ultimately overcomes a fanatic's ability to invoke repressed conditioning. A recurring theme is Tuvok's "hunches", which he can neither explain nor ignore. Another feature of this episode is the Vulcan mind meld being used to force or invoke uncharacteristic behaviour. It is unclear how many of the former Maquis crew members on Voyager had been exposed to the fanatic's mind control techniques.
This may be a rare instance of a forced mind meld creating aberrant behaviour in the victim. This is also the only onscreen mention of the name of Chakotay 's Maquis ship, the Val Jean. As the Bajoran chants incantations, images of Voyager crew, formerly Maquis, appear on his screen. As the film starts, Tom deletes the holographic audience, revealing Tabor Jad Mager , comatose in the front row.
The Doctor finds cranial microfractures and subdermal contusions along his right shoulder. Captain Janeway puts Tuvok in charge of the investigation into the attack.
Tuvok's uncharacteristic "hunch" is that someone on Voyager is responsible. Crewmen Yosa Mark Rafael Truitt , checking pressure seals in a Jefferies tube , is plunged into sudden darkness and his communications badge fails, then a bright light shines in his face. Feeling threatened, he retreats but is unable to get the computer to seal the hatch behind him.
The Doctor examines Yosa in Sickbay and reports that Yosa's neocortical readings are identical to Tabor's, with the same injuries. The five comatose crewmen in Sickbay, with the same disruptions in their synaptic pathways, contusions and microfractures, are all former Maquis. The Doctor is baffled and cannot find a cure. Tuvok notes that the assailant must have access to security protocols. Chakotay cautions the other, nervous, former Maquis: Meanwhile, Tom Paris and Kim have captured a displaced photon negative image of two humanoid figures on the holodeck — Ensign Tabor and his assailant.
Tuvok asks them to increase the resolution of the images and keep him informed. The attacks began after the last data stream from Starfleet , so Tuvok's investigation includes the personal content of that transmission, including a letter from Kim's cousin Dennis. Of the twenty eight recipients, only six match the parameters of the assailant's negative image. Tuvok points out that Kim's letter mentions a friend who was killed by the Maquis years ago.
As Kim angrily defends his innocence, Tuvok becomes strangely perturbed. The Doctor summons Tuvok to Sickbay, where Tabor has revived spontaneously, with no memory of the assault. The whole fragile family later becomes a suspect when the father is murdered. Eventually it is proven Megan is a virgin and the rape was a false memory planted by her therapist. Megan's sister Blythe Auffarth confesses to accidentally killing her father and the police arrest the therapist and charge her with reckless endangerment. Special Appearance by Ben Gazzara.
When a baby is abducted from her mother Kerri Green in a grocery store, Detectives Benson and Stabler are led to Mark Sanford Bruce Altman , a private adoption lawyer with dubious business practices. The investigation of the adoption service opens up a twelve-year-old case originally handled by Sgt. Max Greevey and Don Cragen involving a twelve year old boy Ian Cronin who has been missing since he was a baby after his mother was murdered.
Captain Cragen teams up with Munch to solve the case. A series of rapes, each more violent than the previous, takes place in a community of African-Americans. Detectives Benson and Stabler promptly suspect a known HIV-positive sex offender Dorian Missick who was recently released from jail character partly inspired by real-life sex offender Nushawn Williams , however he dies of an overdose and is found on a rooftop.
The attacks continue and Detective Tutuola's childhood friends' daughter is killed. As they find nothing, her brother Rodney Thompson Todd Williams accuses the police of limiting the budget put on the case. Only when a fifth victim is killed, do her final moments alongside Thompson's persistence give them what they need to find the killer. A known doctor is killed and his wife Lisa Eichhorn is raped. Detectives Benson and Stabler question the doctor's estranged and troubled son Geoffrey Wigdor from the doctor's previous marriage.
They also locate a former patient John-Lule Montias who holds a grudge against the doctor. When the rapist then attacks the doctor's former mistress Liza Weil , the squad realizes that both the wife and the mistress know more than they let on. They try to catch a serial rapist and murderer. Their suspect is a recently released prisoner Kevin Chamberlin , who was put in jail years ago due to Hawk. Alas, they come to deduce that not only is the predator someone else, but that the former prisoner is innocent of the previous murders, which means that Hawk was responsible for putting an innocent man behind bars.
An unidentified man Mark-Paul Gosselaar is found shot and sexually assaulted in an alley outside of a gay bar. Detectives Benson and Stabler learn that the victim and his wife Elizabeth Banks have a young daughter Audrey Twitchell with cystic fibrosis and that they worked in the porn industry to pay for her medical bills.
The lead witness Kevin Geer , who is a recovering drug addict, angers Fin, causing him to re-think his police role. A young Asian woman Lynn Chen is severely beaten and raped at a burglary site. Benson and Stabler initially suspect rival Asian gang members, who are in dispute over the victim's loyalty. This theory is disproven when they find another Asian victim and track down serial rapist Darrell Guan Marcus Chong. Guan was ostracized throughout his childhood and feels that even his own mother Wai Ching Ho did not love him.
The case hits close to home for Benson because Guan is also the product of a rape. The trial focuses on the impact of genetic predisposition versus environmental upbringing on the nature of violence. A five-year-old girl is found viciously beaten to death in foster care. Detectives Benson and Stabler investigate her complicated family ties. They learn the girl's birth mother Erika LaVonn always tried to get back her daughter from the foster mother Kathleen Wilhoite and foster grandmother Piper Laurie. They then investigate her introverted foster brother Colin Fickes. Captain Cragen manages to reach out to him with the help of a video game.
A pregnant woman Tricia Paoluccio is attacked and has her fetus ripped from her womb. Detectives Benson and Stabler quickly look for the baby hoping he's still alive. The woman's husband John Ritter seems shocked, but it is soon discovered she may have had an affair with a construction worker Bobby Cannavale. The resulting trial has ADA Alex Cabot trying to argue that the fetus had a right to live without treading into the controversial territory of reproductive rights.
A six-year-old boy is abandoned by his mother Elpidia Carrillo in an emergency room after having been shot. Detectives Benson and Stabler look for his missing family members in order to find his shooter Louie Leonardo while Munch attempts to get through to the boy's ten-year-old brother Jean-Luke Figueroa.
The Psychology of Anger and Anger Management : Insult, Revenge, and Forgiveness
Eventually, it becomes clear that the whole family is in danger. A man and a woman are stabbed during a supposedly romantic park encounter. The woman's head as well as her hands are missing, which makes it difficult for detectives Benson and Stabler to identify the victims. They soon learn that the crime scene was staged and that the woman was an officer of the Manhattan Federation for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. This leads them to various people from her organization, as well as its opposers, and a young sociopath Michael Pitt who had a troubled relationship with the woman.
However they soon uncover a more violent suspect Brian Sullivan much more close.
- Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (season 3) - Wikipedia;
- Pull Me Closer - Book 1 (Suits in Pursuit)!
- Repression (Star Trek: Voyager) - Wikipedia.
- Vampira - Folge 06: Blutspur (German Edition).
A woman's body is found near her car after she was raped.